Real Talk: Hypocrisy and Hi-Lo’s

*Additional photos of clothing/accessories will be added to within a week of posting, since I’m working with only one of my closets*

I was a jerk as younger-me when it came to trends that others liked that I found to be beneath me. Not that I’d stop being friends with someone if they were interested in whatever caused me to hipster-scoff, but there would be shade thrown in their general direction.

And for that, I’m a lowly hypocrite, because more often than not, I’d finally come around to stop hating whatever it was that the rest of society embraced long ago. It’s totally science, so at least I’m normal?

The kicker is that this isn’t something that stopped around a given age when I had some epiphany amount what an awful person I am for judging people for their decisions – the most recent example is from January 2014. Aka, I’m a jerk-faced 19 year old, too.

1. Hi-lo’s:

The mullet dress/skirt was what I first dubbed any clothing article that had a higher cut in the front, with the back being inexplicably longer. Much sass was geared at my favourite boutiques for carrying an abomination to fashion.

Then I tried on a mullet dress.

And I looked majestic.

Now they’re a staple of my wardrobe – affectionately called butt-capes – hanging in both of my closets:

2. Floral print:

In early high school, floral print became fashionable. Convinced I would look like wall paper from my childhood, I stayed away from botanical clothing and accessories.

This trend was met with confusion – I couldn’t fathom why person would want to dress like their grandmother’s couch. More of a raised brow than an eye-roll, if you will.

Considering I was less revolted by the trend, I wasn’t as appalled when floral print slowly made its presence in my closets, reaching a point where I would prefer floral to other patterns:

3.  Mary-Kate and Ashley:

Not that gendered toys were anything that ever crossed my mind as a child, but looking back, I’d say I had a good balance between boy and girl toys (kudos to parents on that). Much like a miniature Toys’R’Us circa 2001, my play area was littered with a large collection of Barbies and Polly Pockets, stuffed animals, legos, sticker books, science experiment kits, outdoor sports stuff, bug catching kits, ballet things, educational computer games, video games, Harry Potter, Pokemon and Sailor Moon merch, and an array of  fiction and non-fiction books.

You could categorise me as either a tom-boy or a girly-girl, both worked.

But this isn’t a rant about gendered toys – it’s about my first guilty pleasure.

For those born between early to mid 1990’s, I’d say that at least one thing from the Mary-Kate and Ashley cash cow of merchandise has been a part of your childhood.

That being said, I despised then. They weren’t saving the world, they didn’t have special powers, and they screamed a lot to express as many emotions as possible which is annoying regardless of who you are. To me, they were heavily scripted reality tv with zero substance.

Was that sentence redundant?

I digress.

Then everything changed when my mum’s friend’s daughter brought along her Mary-Kate and Ashley dolls to our house. Since she was younger than me, I played along with her toys so as to not be rude to our guest. I wasn’t pleased, but after I while I realised that there was no basis for my disgust in the franchise, which led to my obsession.

Whatever I could get my hands on, I wanted it.

I was like Squidward, when he finally tried a krabby patty, but with 100% less exploding thighs.

4. My choice of university:

I pride myself on being organised and knowing what I’m going to be doing for the next 10 years of my life. It’s school for the next decade, but that still sounds impressive, no?

There wasn’t any question regarding what university I’d attend once I finished CEGEP; McGill was in Montreal and it was in our family, so it made sense. They teach the program I’m looking to pursue, from ungrad to post-grad – so I was set.

Then I received a small purple booklet in the mail over the winter break this past year.

Gorgeous campus, small class sizes, a program more fit to my future, and loads of school spirit.

I could live on campus but not have to leave the province. Bishop’s sounded perfect.

Full honesty, toying with the idea of being a Gaiter instead of a Redman caused me more anxiety than it should have – but what would you expect when you’ve “known” your next step for nearly five years and it suddenly might change?

In the end, I made my decision to stock up on purple, and I’ll be heading to Lennoxville at the end of August. By no means do I regret this decision, but you have to agree that this one has more impact on my life than deciding to wear a floral hi-lo dress designed by Mary-Kate and Ashley.